Confession: I’m drowning in my to-read pile. When I realized that it would be VERY hard to fit in E. Van Lowe’s Never Slow Dance With A Zombie in the time frame of Zombie Appreciation Week, I did the unthinkable. I dragooned my entirely too-accommodating 19-year old brother into completing the task! He’s really possibly the nicest kid around. I mean, who reads a girly, fluffy zombie book for their sister? And reviews it afterward? My sheet-metal working, camouflage wearing youngest brother, that’s who.
Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion meets Night of the Living Dead in this laugh-out-loud debut YA novel by Emmy Award-nominated TV writer E. Van Lowe.
Principal Taft's 3 Simple Rules for Surviving a Zombie Uprising:
Rule #1: While in the halls, walk slowly and wear a vacant expression on your face. Zombies won't attack other zombies.
Rule #2: Never travel alone. Move in packs. Follow the crowd. Zombies detest blatant displays of individuality.
Rule #3: If a zombie should attack, do not run. Instead, throw raw steak at to him. Zombies love raw meat. This display of kindness will go a long way.
On the night of her middle school graduation, Margot Jean Johnson wrote a high school manifesto detailing her goals for what she was sure would be a most excellent high school career. She and her best friend, Sybil, would be popular and, most important, have boyfriends. Three years later, they haven't accomplished a thing!
Then Margot and Sybil arrive at school one day to find that most of the student body has been turned into flesh-eating zombies. When kooky Principal Taft asks the girls to coexist with the zombies until the end of the semester, they realize that this is the perfect opportunity to live out their high school dreams. All they have to do is stay alive....
My Brain Hurts…
Halfway through reading Never Slow Dance With A Zombie, I was ready to put the book down. The beginning was rather slow (this coming from someone who read the book in two hours) and the plot was very simple.
Basically, it’s like this: Zombies taking over a high school do wonders for people who feel they don’t fit in or are not part of the hip crowd. However, too much imagination is required to make it work, especially the part about how the parents in the book don’t care about children. The book was funny in parts, but the plot was extremely far-fetched, implausible and fairly sappy.